Lesson Learnt

A touch of inexperience and ineptitude leaves your opinions one-sided and myopic  along with your expectations and anticipations but a little touch from the other side leaves you illuminated and aware, something we all need, awareness.

When you're aware of all the possibilities, your actions become more calculated and you're better responsible for you and your actions, and when things go wrong you respond better having made accounts and counted the cost...the pain doesn't surprise you. 

This lesson took time to learn but it was worthwhile, I mean we can't anticipate all the changes that are bound to happen up and along the road, very much like sitting in a roller-coaster blindfolded; an unending fluctuation of ups and downs, a metaphor for the vicissitudes of life; just a winding road of unanticipated changes. I have learnt that the best you can do on each ride is to resign yourself to enjoying it but I guess it's just a lot easier to enjoy when before stepping onto the ride you're well aware of the possibilities.

About two years ago, being as naive as I was I stepped onto a ride and the end result caught me unawares, shocked, wounded and damn near depressed, I learnt a valuable lesson that though love is sweet and blissful and my opinion was not all false, love also offers another flavour; one less likely to be spoken of. So I learnt and my journey to awareness began...

So I wrote a piece for how I hit my learning curve(where it all started), comical in its elements yet true of its feeling..aaaahhh just kidding this is for laughs enjoy.

Lesson Learnt.

Listening to Lemar

Has got me thinking about the one that got away

It’s funny how she left me with a scar

And now she’s a friend to stay.

I find funnier how songs can do that to you

And their words are so so true

They leave you all so blue

And stuck in your room to rue

It’s official I hate love songs!!!

And the emotions they stir along

Or am I just too sentimental?

Crapp!!!! This shit is driving me mental!!!

NO Lemar!!! There is not much justice in the world!!

So stop searching for any truth in a word.

No, I didn’t meet her first, it’s true

But what we felt was true

Though we had no clue

That we’d both end up feeling blue

One for a different reason than the other

All I wanted was to be her lover

But she just couldn’t leave the other.

Now I fear I may never feel the same for another.

This morning I caught cupid fly by

Trying to do a drive-by

I shot that son-of-a-bitch right out of the sky.

It was with his own arrow too

Just so he’d know how it feels to be a number 2.

That naked brat does not know the troubles he does incur

With those arrows that strong emotions do stir.

I guess he’s never tasted love

To know its bitter-sweet after taste

First you’re floating like a dove

And then bam!!! Next like a dried up date

And if you didn’t know, that’s a fruit

Please, don’t hate

Oh charley allow my horn to toot.

I guess it was sweet when first we did kiss

A moment sad to say I don’t really miss

In the beginning we both thought it was romantic,

Then got to frantic,

Then things that are normally small become gigantic

And we find ourselves sinking like the titanic

True, I stole those words from Talib Kweli

But guess what?? He ain’t no Mohammed Ali.

You see it’s sweet in the beginning and then bitter

When her words finally leave you slapped sober,

Or she dies and leaves you, both ways it’s over.

Every gain with its loss, and every silver with its dross

Love comes and goes

But it’s bitter-sweet when it does.

Lesson learnt.

bugging me

Not been writing these days, just basically for the lack of inspiration of any sort...I guess something just has to give before I can give. Well... just lying in bed plagued with thoughts concerning recent events unable to ignore a particular series of questions that have and keep troubling my mind and have constantly done so in ages past... I guess I’m just built that way*chuckle*

I am constantly plagued with the need to question everything I come across and resolve and derive some sort of logical explanation for things others just skim over or just don’t notice. Yet ironically the question that boggles my mind is the inability of those in the faith to question anything at all? No hunger for knowledge, none at all? We’re all apathetic in the faith no desire for a greater understanding in the things of God, we’re happy to walk around in our day to day lives knowing that we have read through most parts of the  of the Bible and yet a greater percent of what we have read we do not understand. We have no questions for the somewhat seemingly controversial sections of the written code of our faith for fear that such questions will shipwreck us, not realising the potential  that the answers to such questions hold in drawing us nearer to our creator also, yet the thought of being found heretic or blasphemous scares us ignorant. Actually, we don’t realise that all who in the past and biblical ages, who held a greater depth of the knowledge of the TRUTH, were found blasphemous. Our saviour himself, being the TRUTH was found blasphemous by the scholars of the day. Halt!!!! WARNING!!!! This is not reason to feed our ego’s hunger for delusions of grandeur especially when we have been found in the wrong or as one propagating a false doctrine or deceptive ‘revelation’ and label ourselves as being ‘persecuted’ but an attempt to throw light on our lack of a ‘Berean’ mindset. We are so scared to search the scriptures out for ourselves that we leave it to the ‘Uber –christians’ who are as much liable to error as we are.

Heb 5:12 MKJV  For indeed because of the time, you ought to be teachers, you have need that one teach you again what are the first principles of the oracles of God. And you have become in need of milk, and not of solid food.

The author of Hebrews wrote this concerning the constant need of his audience for someone to teach them time and again the elementary truths concerning Christ and the oracles (prophecies or just plain Word) of God. For that reason he took his time to expatiate on several themes concerning the various prophecies about the Christ, he had no problem doing this but his problem was the fact that after all the time they had spent in Christ they still needed teachers when they ought to be teachers. You see it is acceptable to see a baby crawling but when you see a grown adult man on all fours....there are questions left to be answered.

It is true that the secret things belong to God and therefore we can’t expect all our questions to be answered (Deu 29:29)but those written in the word are revealed and belong to us and God expects us to question, seek answers and meditate thereon, after all it is the glory of kings(Proverbs 25:2).

I guess it’s the effect of hectic lives, trying to make ends meet, meeting deadlines, survival has become of primary concern and we’ve relegated God to the backdrop. We’re so bent on making it in this world we can afford to live in ignorance of the truths or much more Truth of God’s word, ignoring the wise words of Paul , “Godly exercise holds value in this world and more.” And the more popular, “Seek first.....”  I don’t need to finish it we all know it.

And for those of us crying foul that we need someone to explain what we read, I believe John has a lot to say to that:

1Jn 2:20 ISV You have an anointing from the Holy One and know all things.

1Jn 2:27 ISV The anointing you received from him abides in you, and you do not need anyone to teach you. Instead, because his anointing teaches you about everything and is true and not a lie, abide in him, as he taught you to do.

Funny, when Abraham sent his servant to look for a wife for his son Isaac and found Rebecca; a woman who had never laid eyes on her groom to be, I’m sure she had questions concerning Isaac on their way to meet him yet funny enough the bride of Christ has no questions to ask the Holy Spirit concerning Him on their way back to her very own wedding reception. This apathetic outlook on obtaining knowledge and understanding concerning the very oracles of God is largely due to the ignorance of its consequence. We don’t realise that the apostasy spoken of in the New Testament is largely due to ignorance and oh!! If you don’t know what I am talking of then you better check yourself....jk.

In the law of Moses the people of Israel were encouraged to eat of the animals that ‘dividedth the hoof and cheweth the curd.’ How does this apply in the New Testament, we find that in the epistle of Paul when he talks about dietary requirements of the law he forbade nothing except the eating of food offered to idols saying that they were offered to demons and the partaking thereof meant the partaking in the fellowship of demons just as the Lord’s supper meant to be as a symbol of the partaking of the fellowship and suffering of Christ just so this dietary law stated was intended to mean the partaking of a nature. A nature that rightly divides the word of truth; ‘dividedth the hoof’, and ‘cheweth the curd’- meditation, for after the ruminant feeds on the word of God and partly digests it, it then regurgitates the curd in its quiet place and time after the initial ingestion. God intended for us to take in his word and bring them up for meditation in our quiet moments by ourselves.

Psa 1:1-6 MKJV  Blessed is the man who has not walked in the counsel of the ungodly, and has not stood in the way of sinners, and has not sat in the seat of the scornful.  (2)  But his delight is only in the Law of Jehovah; and in His Law he meditates day and night.  (3)  And he shall be like a tree planted by the rivulets of water that brings forth its fruit in its seasons, and its leaf shall not wither, and all which he does shall be blessed.  (4)  The wicked are not so, but are like chaff which the wind drives away.  (5)  Therefore the ungodly shall not stand in the judgment, nor sinners in the congregation of the righteous.  (6)  For Jehovah knows the way of the righteous; but the way of the ungodly shall perish.

Many of us have read the verse above and have never related it to the great falling away (and if you checked, you’re probs right it’s synonymous to apostasy). You might be asking yourself how does this relate to the apostasy of the end times, rather it provides a cure in verse 2 to prevent falling away from the truth, you see in verse 4 the prophet or rather psalmist talk about being blown away like chaff, a description much reminiscent of that used by Paul in:

 Eph 4:14 MKJV  so that we no longer may be infants, tossed to and fro and carried about by every wind of doctrine, in the dishonesty of men, in cunning craftiness, to the wiles of deceit.

Here he speaks of the purpose of the ministerial gifts in facilitating our growth in unity and in the knowledge of God. We find that in verse 5 of the first psalm he talks about the congregation of the righteous (hint: Judgement day) for he says they are like chaff that the wind blows along, they are blown along by every wind of doctrine.

 Interesting enough when Old Testament Hebrews wanted to separate the wheat from its chaff they rubbed them on a board (named Tribulum latin origin for word tribulation) and tossed it into the air for the wind to separate the chaff. It seems as part of the wheat separating process God allows for the propagation of deceptions of all sorts in the times of tribulation or end times to separate the wheat from the chaff so we find Paul saying that in the last days knowledge shall abound and men will chase after deceptions to tickle their ears, we find the first statement of Jesus’ warnings to the apostles concerning the end times being ‘be careful that you are not deceived’. Ignorance therefore leaves our feet ungrounded and our foundations weak and exposed to storms and winds. So we find Peter saying as part of our first steps in the faith:

2Pe 1:5-6 MKJV  But also in this very thing, bringing in all diligence, filling out your faith with virtue, and with virtue, knowledge;  (6)  and with knowledge self-control, and with self-control, patience, and with patience, godliness,

And later on he goes on to say:

2Pe 1:8-10 MKJV  For if these things are in you and abound, they make you to be neither idle nor unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ.  (9)  For he in whom these things are not present is blind and cannot see afar off and has forgotten that he was purged from his sins in the past.  (10)  Therefore, brothers, rather be diligent to make your calling and election sure, for if you do these things, you shall never fall.

Three things to note (obviously the phrases underlined in the verses above), the first being: after you’ve done the steps outlined in verses 5-7, namely obtaining knowledge after you’ve become virtuous you will not be unfruitful, remind you of something?? If not let me explain, in the first psalm the psalmist likens the one who meditates on the word to a tree planted by the rivers of water which is fruitful in its season, meaning he bears fruit or as Peter puts it bearing fruit in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ, meaning he becomes productive in the cause of God, he bears fruit of the work done in him, the fruit of the Spirit, the salvation of souls and a contribution to the progress of the kingdom, the end result is his ability to stand in the judgment and the congregation of the righteous and not falling, the second thing of note.

Now you’re probably wondering why is ‘calling and election sure’ underlined. Well because it that phrase easily ignored is of great importance because it was first used by our Master, “For many are called but few are chosen.” (Greek used for ‘chosen’ also means ‘elected’: ‘eklektos’ from which we get ‘ekklesias’ meaning the church)

The importance of the word will be explained probably later as God’s purpose in election is revealed and explained but not for this current space and time. So we find Peter says we have gone through a procedure of calling and election and we must do all we can to maintain its certainty and that is by adding knowledge to virtue.

The lesson for today: our ignorance threatens our position and our grounding in Christ.

“Wisdom cries outside; she utters her voice in the streets.”

Searching......

You try your best, but ends up being the worst.

When all works you down, leaves you with nothing but a frown.

It’s hard not to keel over, and just get run over.

Harder not to succumb, when the situation just leaves you dumb and all you want is to go numb.

So you put up that wall, hoping it never does fall.

Then you’re just left to stall........

Left stalling the inevitable; the most probable.

A scratch and a nick, the clocks go ‘tick tick’.

The works and antics of time, leaves you with the sour taste of lime.

........................

So you back back up, and trace where you let up;

that guard ever so dear, ultimately leaving you with a tear.

 So you build and build bigger hoping it might just be tougher.

Boundaries defined clearly, for all and sundry,

defence systems; valuable as empty cisterns.

The futility of your efforts to safeguard your forts and avoid fiery darts,

is betrayed by your inner-longing, and constant romanticising,

by the self-same builder; just another loner.

A hopeless romantic, just frantic;

frantic to let down and let in,

drawn in and now your ship is capsizin’.

So you’re back to square one, with your heart even more stunned,

 wondering, just left wandering........

blown and tossed to and fro, left with no strength to resist the flow..............

.........................

But you find that one, who makes you hope this’ the last one,

Slightly off the mark of perfection, leaving you with no question,

no doubt, just one thought and a secret feeling in your heart.....

It’s he, or rather, she..........

Random thougts

What to write on?....shhhh prrrrrrrrr.........

Lacking inspiration.....

What is it to begin with? Is it that thought provoking or idea inceptive whim?

Some sort of experience that questions our current outlook on life. Something to test our ‘thus-far’ understanding of what life consists. ‘Necessity is the mother of all inventions.’ I guess some of the greatest literary works came from the most intense and darkest emotions. I guess whatever we do is some sort of self-expression, a revelation of who we are internally. I guess it’s why we love musicians and music, their natural gifts of expression leave us thinking we are not alone in this world, just look at all the music awards, those that sweep them are usually the most emotive or poignant and pregnant with feelings. Our favourite songs are those that speak or reveal some experience we’ve once been through. The power of identification, empathy or sometimes just sympathy is yet to be understood; we’ve only scratched the surface, naturally we all just share this innate bond of humanity, this common understanding that our experiences are not isolated incidents, we share them together as part of what is supposed to be a normal life, we’ve all been disappointed, we’ve all been heart-broken, we’ve all felt the joys of gain or the grief of loss, loved the warmth of an embrace, the bliss of new love, the death of old or just been elevated by a longed-for smile; generally the vicissitudes of life really, the fact that some of these phrases sound banal reveals they are common experiences to all. I guess opposites do not always attract; at least with people. We bond over shared experiences all the while thinking, “He’s just like me” or “she’s just like me”, we love the reflections of ourselves in others and so much unspeakable so, a piece of us propagated through the masses and the more we find that we are alike the more in love we fall; just narcissistic tendencies really, we seem to fall for ourselves. We are so in love with our images we specifically look for it in others and call it ‘similarities’.

I guess that’s just the effect of being born human; no man is an island, we don’t stand alone and would rather stand with someone just like us; a higher probability of survival and accuracy in self-reproduction through the ages, really we are all programmed that way, just looking to survive. Looking to wake up the next morning with the sun rise and go back to bed with the sunset, from dusk to dawn we do just that; survive, at least at the core that’s what we all do and somehow we’ve been deceived into thinking it will just be easier with someone next to us. I guess it’s just an inner longing, some sort of evolutionary programming, even creationists agree; “It is not good for man to be alone.”Serves as explanation enough for the question of why are all the majority of songs written with the inspiration of some sort of social interaction.

We sometimes deceive ourselves into thinking our lives do not revolve around people when our every single experience of living consists of another person other than ourselves, we do not wake up in the mornings and walk into empty streets or turn our TV’s on to blank screens, the most parts of our lives are made up of people and in turn people make our lives, our experiences are not with ourselves but are with people, the emotions we feel do not come out of a vacuum. The muse of an experience is then that, the people involved. Our inspirations from an experience come from the persons involved.